Movie Review: Tees Maar Khan (Hindi) 118

After two successive hits, ‘Main Hoon Na’ and ‘Om Shanti Om’, the bare minimum that you expect from Farah Khan is a pop-corn entertainer or at least a fare that you can tolerate for a couple of hours. Well, that didn’t happen with ‘Tees Maar Khan’.

If it were so bad, one would wonder, did she keep up with Akshay Kumar’s track record of mindless comedies especially those with Katrina which raked in moolah? No way! She just took his comedies to an all time nadir sure to fail miserably at the Box Office.

While Farah Khan stands to take all the blame for being the Director, in fact, Shrish Kunder seems to be errant. Juggling writing, editing, lyrics and production proved to be too much for Kunder whose previous outing with Akshay, Jaan-E-Mann had flopped baldy. She probably had a tough time melding family and business.

Based on a 1996 Peter Sellers starrer, TMK is about Tabrez Mirza Khan (Akshay Kumar) who calls himself semi-Robin Hood, for he steals from the rich but gives not to the poor. Obviously, catching him is a tough act for cops. He is hired by conmen Johari Brothers (Raghu and Rajiv of ‘Roadies’ fame) to steal a train full of antiques.

To accomplish this, he masquerades as a Hollywood Director Majoj Day Ramlan and stages the act of making a film. He casts an Oscar-obsessed star (Akshaye Khanna) and his B-grade wannabe actress girlfriend Anya (Katrina Kaif) and deceives an entire village into accompanying him thinking that they’re acting out a crucial scene.

Although the premise itself may not be a bad thought, considering that it worked for an earlier film, incoherent scenes, poor dialog, taste-less humor et al lead to the most worthless two hours of your life. Farah the Choreographer excels with songs Sheela-ki-Jawani and Wallah-Re-Wallah, but they do too little to keep the sinking TMK afloat.

For the filmmakers, disability, color or gender preferences seem to be source of their humor. While one was a joke on a dark robber being visible only when he smiled, the others included Siamese twins who seem to talk simultaneously and a villager with a skin condition being cast as a Briton. Three villagers dressed in Pink act effeminate and a cop-duo chasing Khan are shown to be amorous.

True, brainless comedies often work, but TMK seriously undermines audience intelligence. If Farah Khan and Shirish Kunder thought casting a hit pair, copying a foreign film, a couple of songs and silly gags are all that movie should have, they’ve been caught on the wrong foot. To keep your sanity, just stay away from this flick.

In the closing credits, the film-makers are seen awarding themselves. Let them, for they won’t be able to lay their hands on the real stuff anyway!

Rating 2/10: Worthless flick that reeks of Overconfidence! Keep Out!